AMAZING DISGRACE x Talitha Mayisha

Photo x Hideyuki Ishibashi

AMAZING DISGRACE

Talitha Mayisha

Destruction flirts with me in a fidgety silence

A dichotomy in my debauchery

I’m on a pedestal of elusive lemon blossoms

And the wind touches me

Like a breath of hungry vines

Groping me from behind

I find a still mind more frightening

Than every black hole I keep diving into

The words still cling to my flesh like a loose tooth

Every time I touch it a pain sears through me

I keep touching it

I can’t help myself

Sometimes I sing through the leaves of my consciousness

And find a place of longing

But I always lose my way back to the words

That cling and cling and cling

I was never much of a singer I guess

Colours are made of words

And when I paint my dreams in regret

Fill them with every word once spoken

Dream-lose my teeth

And wake up depleted without anything to fall back on –

I stay silent

I wish to be let down

Hide me in the bushes – I’m just here for the words

Let me stay in the shadows

The world feels safer from afar

Sedate me out of this world

As I stare into the vastness of what it means to be alive

Meaningless words comfort me

Just like the sky always gives me some sort of solace in the night

I don’t know why

Maybe because I’m never sure the stars

Are gonna deliver on the promise of another day

Find me lost in forever

Find me lost in the forest of forgotten dreams and a remorse-painted sun

Find me lost in this black hole

Where the words are never gone

Talitha Mayisha is an up and coming female poet who performs all over Amsterdam. She was raised in a strict, fundamentalist Christian household, and after an extended illness, she broke free of her religion and began to write poetry. Her powerful performances are full of passion and her written work challenge both Christian indoctrination and queer identity stereotypes. This is her second poem in Rx.

Hideyuki Ishibashi was born in Kobe, Japan. After getting his bachelor of fine arts at Nihon University of Art in Tokyo, he moved to Lille in the North of France where he lives and works. His work is based on photography and he mainly uses techniques of collage. https://www.hideyukiishibashi.com/

The photographs that we encounter in our daily lives are merely a piece or a collection of fragments of images. Any image is just a projection of images we have already seen somewhere before, branded with the images of ideals of our times. In other words, photography, itself, has no defined meaning (true meaning) or historical unity, but it develop meaning by being duplicated and represented (meaning production). Therefore, my research is based mainly on two aspects. Concept: How do we look at an image? How can an installation respond to an observer? How do the lines evolve between private and public, between individuals and groups? Realization: Appropriation of found, anonymous materials, publicity or historical images and the association of different techniques or layers.’

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